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Saturday, November 28, 2009

I walked into this

I have been fighting what seems to be a losing battle with my youngest, Alexis. She has picked up the very unpleasant habit of DEMANDING things from us versus using her manner words. I have gotten in the habit of just ignoring her when she does this, but thus far it does not seem to be working. Of course, I have only been doing this for about a week or so, so I probably have about another 5-7 years of this behavior before it is completely eliminated. (She is particularly stubborn...got stuck twice coming out of the birth canal. I should have run away screaming then.) When Alexis does use her manner words unprompted, I of course make a huge deal out of it. What no one tells you when you are a parent is that you will have to make a huge deal out of things that as an adult, you think your child should know about. Hell, my job exists in part because some parents are not aware that there are things you need to make a huge deal about even though they seem self-evident to their adult brains. But seriously, does anyone ever think that you would have to praise your child for pooping in the appropriate receptacle during potty training when you are giving birth? But I digress...

We got a very large box from Amazon.com today. After removing the contents of this box (Christmas presents), we put it in the office. Alexis noticed it while I was folding a very large (OK, mountainous) pile of laundry and watching the House I had DVR'ed. Who knew that Cuddy was so cunning as to trick House like that? Anyways, she asked if she could play with it. Since 3/4 of the living room floor was covered with laundry, I had to tell her she had to wait. (Don't judge me, OK? My family has enough underwear and socks to last us at least a month, so it is not like we were wearing the same shit over and over again.) She sat on the couch and watched me closer than Republicans watch those gays and lesbians and their devious agendas to recruit their children into their unnatural chosen lifestyles. When I was done, she asked again about the very large box. I told her I just had to put my clothes away, as did her sister. As I was picking up the clothes, I handed her a towel and made The Fatal Parenting Mistake: I asked her if she wanted to put the towel away. I did not tell her to put it away, couched in a Very Polite Tone. I asked. Her response? "No, Thank you". Then she sat there looking up at me, the look on her face clearly stating, "Woman, where is my praise for using my manner words?"

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