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Thursday, May 3, 2012

Random III

Charlie came home from daycare with a rather large goose egg down the middle of her forehead.  She was running and tripped and bashed her head into a table.  I guess she made that table her bitch.  She OWNS that table now.  Honestly, I am just glad that she was not climbing on that table and dancing on it.  She is my child, though to look at her appearance one would have to strongly question her maternity.

She also has another fucking ear infection and her tubes are clogged again.  What is the average cost of raising a child up to now?  All I gots to say is, she better go to a cheap ass college or get a full ride scholarship because she is totally using up all of that money on her medical bills now.  Cause you know, once she hits that average I am so cutting her off and making her get a job...

Alexis has learned the art of stalling.  Specifically, dragging out bedtime routine so she does not have to go to bed.  I decided to go all Love and Logic on her ass and stop nagging because really, it is way too much effort.  I told her that she would have to start making up the time the next day, meaning that she would have to go to bed earlier, and that by my calculations she needed to go to bed now.  Parent of the year I am not, but it got my point across.

Elizabeth just told me that there was a slug on her shoe (which was really my shoe she was wearing...) and that she had wiped it off.  Not only did she wipe it off, but she disinfected the shoe.  Then she told me that she had a slug in her hair as well.  I did not ask questions.  Sometimes it is just better that way.  Though I do wonder if she disinfected her hair as well...

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