Me: Huh. I'm glad we are not giraffes.
Charles: ?
Me: According to this list of weird facts, "To know when to mate, a male giraffe will continuously headbutt the female in the bladder until she urinates. The male then tastes the pee and that helps it determine whether the female is ovulating"
Charles: I would just head butt your head.
Me: I know, right? I'm glad for both of us here. Me because I don't want to be head butted in the bladder, and you because you don't have to drink my pee. That's just weird foreplay.
Long pause.
Charles: Uh, OK?
Me: Well, I'm just sayin'...
Charles: (Shaking head.) Well, you brought it up. I'm perfectly ok with just having sex, OK?
Me: Well, if there was ever anyone I would want to drink my pee, it would be you.
Charles: And I promise I won't head butt you anywhere but your head.
We would make lousy giraffes, apparently.
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