Reviews X

Review of Truly Hard Seltzer Celebration Pack:

Peach Fizz: You know how people can have that alcohol that they regret ever having consumed for a variety If reasons? Yeah, peach schnapps was that for me. The reason? I drank like half a bottle Alicia’s freshman year of college the first time I got drunk. I’m telling you this because, for obvious reasons, I generally don’t like peach flavored alcoholic beverages. However, Truly managed to make this a lovely beverage that does not trigger my peach beverage-related PTSD. Way to go, Truly. Though not gonna lie, peach is not a fruit I associate with the holidays. Unless you include Flag Day and Fourth of July. Then sure. Holiday beverage. However, because this does not instantly make me want to turn on Santeria and put on cargo pants and get lit for the first time, I’ll give it a 4.9/5 stars. The .1 deduction came from it simply being peach. Sue me. It is what it is.



Citrus Sparkler: Again, not quite sure how an orange seltzer screams Christmas, but hey…at least it isn’t the cinnamon flavor of Christmas seltzers past. This beverage would probably pair well with either Christmas cookies (but not chocolate chip cookies because they are not Christmas cookies and I will die on that hill) or a hotdog with potato salad.

Rose Style: Explain to me, in little words like I am two, how a beverage can simultaneously be tasteless and have notes of Busch Light Peach? How? I am underwhelmed by this beverage. So much so, that I literally cannot give any further description. It's not not good but it is also not good. But how? I feel like I'm somehow being Rick Rolled with alcoholic beverages.

Cranberry Cheers: This tastes like carbonated cranberries. Which, given the name, I imagine is exactly what they were going for here. It's reminiscent of the can of cranberry sauce that my family just opens and puts on the plate in a big gelatinous cranberry blob. If this was not a liquid it would be exactly that but less sweet. It is not pretentious and does not pretend to be anything more than carbonated, slightly less sweet, Ocean Spray cranberry sauce in beverage form. This is the closest thing to a holiday-like beverage there is in this pack. End notes of holiday stress eating and avoiding your racist, homophobic aunt's questions as to why you have not begun to procreate yet.