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Friday, December 18, 2009


Not me. My husband does not let me date.

He has a friend who is dating. He got involved with this girl who was, quite frankly, the type to make Glenn Close's character in Fatal Attraction look like the picture of mental health. He was trying to get rid of her, by doing things that men do, such as being nice and logical. Hello? Logical does not work with those who have Borderline Personality Disorder! (Not that that is an official diagnosis or anything, but she sure as hell fit the traits...)

He was trying to figure out how to get rid of her. Now if this were a sitcom, he could just pretend to be a momma's boy and she would become so disgusted that she would just leave him. Alas, life is not a sitcom. He even went so far as to kick her out of his bed immediately after sex (and not only his bed, but his house. I did point out that maybe the whole you had sex with her thing was perpetuating her delusions that they had a future, but he is a male and did not see the correlation.)

My husband suggested that he suggest anal or a threesome. Apparently neither were not issues. We pondered for a minute, then I came up with the perfect suggestion.

I told him to ask her if he could pee on her. My husband's friend said my husband and I are sick and we are made for each other. I agree.

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